October 2010
38 posts
By the way
I moved this Tumblr. The new domain is:
http://infinitemix.tumblr.com http://infinitemix.tumblr.com http://infinitemix.tumblr.com http://infinitemix.tumblr.com
I thought about just redirecting this one, but I think I’ll keep it for posterity’s sake.
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NO SKATING
Crazy lady in line at the bank: I have a question for you, since you have a skateboard.
Me: Okay.
Lady: How come, even with a sign up, I get kids jumping off my building?
Me: Uhh, I have no idea.
Lady: I have two signs that say NO SKATING and these skateboarders keep jumping off my building.
Me: I don't know them, so I really have no idea.
My brain: Bitch, you think just because I have a skateboard, I'm some kind of four-wheel menace to society? You don't know me. Fuck you. And FYI it's a longboard, you can't even do fucking tricks on it.
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“We had dinner last night. She made me spaghetti with little hot dogs cut up in...”
– Sheldon and the Hellhound, or How I Lost My Hot Dogs
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September 2010
223 posts
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Relationships the Debra Morgan way:
Step 1. Have a brother who’s wife was just murdered. Step 2. Go to their house with a cop coworker to clean up the blood. Step 3. Afterward, start crying about how you don’t understand your brother. Step 4. Start kissing your coworker, then rip off all your clothes and do it on the kitchen floor. Of the house your sister-in-law was just murdered in. Right after you clean up a bathroom...